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What's your best joke? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #48
Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no hands.

What's green and red and goes round and round? A frog in a blender.

What do you call 100 lawyers at the bottom of a river? A good start.

What's the difference between a clarinet and an onion? People cry when you cut up an onion.

Why is a violin smaller than a viola? It's not, it's just that the violinist's head is bigger.

Why was the side of Helen Keller's face burnt? She picked up the iron when the phone rang.
Why was the other side of Helen Keller's face burnt? The jerk called back.

Two Mexican soldiers, Juan and Ramone, are separated from their company and are wandering lost in the desert. They go without food or water for two weeks when Ramone says he can't go any further and is about to collapse. Juan tells him, "Come on, Ramone, we'll find food and paradise just over the next ridge, I'm sure." So Ramone picks up and they keep on going. Surely enough, they see a tree on the next ridge with bacon growing off of it. Ramone runs up to it shouting, "Juan! Juan! I've found a bacon tree!' when all of a sudden there's a burst of machine gun fire and Ramone drops to the ground, wounded. Juan is stunned and runs to Ramone, crying, "Ramone! Ramone! What happened?" Ramone replies, "Juan, Juan. It was not a bacon tree. It was a hambush!"

I love that joke. You have to say the dialogue with an accent, though.

[ Monday, November 07, 2005 20:15: Message edited by: An error of type -13 occured ]

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
funny animated videos in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #5
Got a free half hour? This is without a doubt the greatest online movie ever created. God bless.

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/demented.php

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Mac OS X in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #16
If your iMac's doing peachily, there's not really much point in switching. There are benefits from having OS X, such as greater software avaliability and the nice feeling of being more on the forefront of technology. But regardless, if you're going to upgrade, DON'T GET A MAC MINI. What Apple did when they made them was take regular old laptop hard drives (which process pretty slowly), put them in a small case, and toss in a few extra MB of ram. It makes much more sense to actually buy an actual laptop (like an iBook or a Powerbook) and buy and install some extra ram yourself. All in all, the cost of buying a Mini and a monitor to go with it is probably much less cost-effective than souping up a laptop. I'd highly recommend a Powerbook or one of the new iMacs (desktop computers have much higher hard drive processing speeds than laptops and Minis both).

And just for the record, Panther (OS 10.3) is really just as good as, if not better than (it's significantly faster than) Tiger (OS 10.4).

Right now I'm using a 2003 iBook, upgraded with Panther and an extra 512 MB of ram. And it runs great!

So to sum, buy an OS X-capable laptop, add in some extra RAM, and find someone with a Panther installation disc. It's a much better deal than a Mini.

[ Thursday, November 03, 2005 18:26: Message edited by: An error of type -13 occured ]

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Naming Your Muscles (a stupid guy thread) in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #13
No, the hair's hair, it's not a muscle. But it seemed important to include that at the time.

Kerry, the ab, is sometimes Carey, in which case she's a girl. She and Natasha are girlfriends, they get along pretty well. But the rest of the gang gets kind of annoyed when they get together. It causes cramps.

Dash and Steve were the original duo. The rest just sort of came along. Mitchell's name was originally Missile until this Spanish guy at French camp pronounced his name more like 'Mitchell'. It stuck, needless to say. Ironically, I refer to The Gang as my "pet rocks".

Incidentally, I really hope nobody is taking this seriously. :P But after seeing the football and basketball teams kissing their muscles, I figured I might as well at least know the names of mine.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Naming Your Muscles (a stupid guy thread) in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
I recently started naming my muscles:

IMAGE(http://img472.imageshack.us/img472/996/robinspecs3ok.jpg)

And the list grows every day. Do you have any names for your muscles, and if so, what are they?

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Came back from Holland to find that most of my best friends are bi. in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #54
Sweet Jaysus, guys. The thing that's really offensive to me is the way people act and the extremes they can adopt when they're offended. Did anyone manage to read the first post without having their discussion juices aroused besides me?

It's an expression. It's not one I agree with in any way, but it's an expression, and I respect that. I respect gays, lesbians, bisexuals, homosexuality in general, it's perfectly peachy with me. But do we have to take this all so seriously?

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Came back from Holland to find that most of my best friends are bi. in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #16
Woah, everyone stop being so politically correct. Everyone interprets differently, and this topic was never meant to be about Christmas and homosexuality anyway, beyond the bisexuality of the dude's friends.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
First Kiss in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #55
Jumping on the bandwagon after everyone else again...

My first kiss was really pretty disappointing. I was in a car with this girl I was sort-of dating, and I kissed her on the cheek for some reason. Somehow I ended up on her lips after that, and before I knew it we were snogging. Sadly enough, it's really not that great. I mean, I was expecting bells and all I got was a sort of "Hmm, interesting" feeling. I mean, while when tongue got involved I was actually thinking "Hey, tongue got involved!". It always seemed like kissing should be thoughtless and blissful. Sigh. I kept kissing her because I wanted that connection to happen. Weird.

Incidentally, did you know that after french kissing someone their saliva stays in your system for about ten days?

[ Friday, October 14, 2005 19:36: Message edited by: An error of type -13 occured ]

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
A Hypothetical Conceived Whilst Drunk in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #1
Only an inebriated Thuryl could yield such wisdom. :)

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
The Abominable Photo Thread 3.6 in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #51
And now for a band photo:

IMAGE(http://www.users.muohio.edu/carlinjm/band/images/WIDE/TMB02.jpg)

I'm the cute percussion captain wearing the blue beret.

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I probably edited this post at some point.
Fo shizzle, my lord.
Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Suomalaisia? (Finnish)? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #23
Everything I have to say on the subject can pretty much be summed up as "WTF?"

"Mehercle!
Rebecca, ecce! tantae clunes isti sunt!

Amica esse videtur istorum hominum rhythmicorum.
Sed, ut scis,
quis homines huiusmodi intellegere potest?
Colloquuntur equidem cum ista eo tantum, quod scortum perfectum esse videtur.
Clunes, aio, maiores esse!
Nec possum credere quam rotondae sint.
En! Quam exstant! Nonne piget te earum?
Ecce mulier Aethiops!

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
This one time at band camp... in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
So I'm a band geek, no doubt about it. Like all enthusiastic Percussion Captains in the world of marching bands, I was a band geek before I even joined band. And like all band geeks, I've gone through those summer days of tramping around on dead grass in the middle of a field again and again under the blazing hot sun in an unreality known as Band Camp.

So, for all my fellow band friends out there, what's your most memorable Band Camp story?

I gotta say mine is either half the guys' dorm, uh, applying icy-hot to their nether regions (I highly recommend it for any other guys out there) or two of the girls in the Pit bringing an enormous inflatable baby pool to Band Camp, inflating and fitting it exactly into their dorm room, filling it up with buckets from the girls' bathroom, and then mixing about three boxes of Tang into it. Or the same girls snorting a line of powdered lemonade. Yeah, good times.

[ Friday, September 16, 2005 19:16: Message edited by: An error of type -13 occured ]

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Graphics! Cheap as Free! in Blades of Exile
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #2
Very nicely done! Did you base these/add on to existing graphics or create them entirely by yourself? It looks like you've got some of both on here; either way, really nice.

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Most intense gaming moment in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #33
To be true to the board, some of my first ones were beating Exile II (after destroying the Empire's portal) and Exile III. Good stuff. More recently was, sadly enough, playing and beating advanced level 47 of MarbleBlast Gold.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Do you like school? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #25
Damn that summer reading. Sweet lord. I never got more than 8 hours of sleep at once over the entire summer, and haven't gotten more than four for the past week.

I love school, but man, Junior year with six freaking honors classes, marching band, fencing, rock climbing, cross country, drama, swimming, and bass lessons is really starting to push it.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
A Touching Tribute: A Satire in Song in Richard White Games
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #11
Hot dog. If poems were fish, that would be a barricuda.

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
were did TM go? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #20
I blame it on cabbage. Anyone who used to breed brassicae oleraceae for a living can't help having gone a bit nuts.

[ Wednesday, August 24, 2005 12:00: Message edited by: Robin ]

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
A plea for iBook help in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
Well, I purchased this PowerPC G3, 128 MB RAM, 900 MHz, Mac OS X 10.2.4 iBook in the summer of 2003. It was fantastic back then, ran smoothly, and even had fastish dial-up internet once I downloaded Firefox. It even managed to dodge all the LogicBoard recalls. However, this thing seems to be slowly winding down. I had to send it in to Apple around half a year ago because it wouldn't start up and lost everything stored on the computer in the process, which was a bummer. I expected it to run fine after that, but it seems to just be getting slower and slower. I've still got 30 gigs of storage space left for what it's worth, following a desparate attempt to speed the thing up by erasing a lot of stuff. But the internet loading speed is at about 1.5 kilobytes per second instead of the 6 it used to be at (either way, that's still archaic, I know; God bless off-campus internet service). Non-internet stuff is going really slowly too. So I'm wondering, is there any way to get this computer back to its old self, short of buying new RAM or spending any money? With OS 9 and earlier, rebuilding the desktop worked pretty well, but that doesn't seem to be possible on these ibooks or anything with OS X. Please help!

[ Wednesday, August 17, 2005 20:04: Message edited by: Robin ]

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Lord Putidus: Buggy Castle in Blades of Avernum
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
In the scenario 'Lord Putidus', I entered Lord Putidus' Tower, explored for a bit, talked to the greeter imp, and tried very hard to go up the stairs to meet the guy, only to find a total lack of special node that would permit me to ascend a level. I poked around in the coding, even though I don't understand BoA coding, and discovered that it looked like there should also have been a special message popping up when I entered the castle, which there wasn't (something about coming in out of the rain). There was a small message in the text box of the game window when I entered the castle, saying that there was a bad code in line 151 of t0castle.txt (something about a 'buffer').

So, what's going on, and how can I play the scenario?

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
What's your favorite cereal? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #28
1st day observations:

Oddly enough, though only 2 people selected 'none of the above' for their favorite kind of cereal, 10 people selected 'none of the above' for the kind of cereal they ate most often, an overwhelming majority. Hmm, creepy.

I go with the off-brand stuff. Toasted Oats easily beat Cheerios; Crisp Rice trounces Rice Krispies; and Fruit Rounds run circles around Froot Loops.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
What's your favorite cereal? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
This is just a poll to satisfy my own curiosity. For those of you who buy everything off-brand (like me), select whichever on-brand cereal is the closest to your version.

Poll Information
This poll contains 5 question(s). 37 user(s) have voted.
You may not view the results of this poll without voting.

function launch_voter () { launch_window("http://www.ironycentral.com/cgi-bin/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=poll;d=vote;pollid=YGQypfJrlhKe"); return true; } // end launch_voter function launch_viewer () { launch_window("http://www.ironycentral.com/cgi-bin/ubb/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=poll;d=view;pollid=YGQypfJrlhKe"); return true; } // end launch_viewer function launch_window (url) { preview = window.open( url, "preview", "width=550,height=300,toolbar=no,location=no,directories=no,status,menubar=no,scrollbars,resizable,copyhistory=no" ); window.preview.focus(); return preview; } // end launch_window IMAGE(votenow.gif)     IMAGE(voteresults.gif)

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Who plays pencil and paper roleplaying games? in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #11
There are RPGs on pencil and paper? Man, ignorance bites.

I'd probably just do what I did as a lovable youthful infant and recreate the entire game so only I could win.

'Course, my parents used to tell me about kids sneaking into libraries to play D&D on the giant, room-sized punchcard computers back in the day.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Insults in General
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #48
Your mom's the status quo in Montana.

That's pretty much how all my insults go.

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Fo shizzle, my lord.

Two goldfish are in a tank. One says to the other, "Do you know how to drive this thing?"
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
New Scenarios in Blades of Exile
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #19
To jump in a bit late, I've always liked scenarios that had a detailed storyline but weren't JUST story. A lot of nice, challenging action is always a plus.

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Tower of Magi Demon in Exile I in The Exile Trilogy
Lifecrafter
Member # 34
Profile Homepage #0
Even though I last played it at least 3 years ago, I've always wondered whether the demon in the center of some maze-ish thing in the Tower of the Magi really plays a role in the story. I killed him once, and I don't think it did anything. Is this demon just randomly there? It seems he was kind of different from other demons.

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Frisbeetarianism is the belief that when you die, your soul goes up on the roof and gets stuck.

'Spiderweb Software' anagrammmed: 'Word-bereft A**wipe'
Posts: 702 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00

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