Profile for Eldibs

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Field	Value
Displayed name	Eldibs
Member number	1468
Title	Lifecrafter
Postcount	818
Homepage	http://www.eldibs.sphosting.com/
Registered	Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00

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Author	Recent posts
Came back from Holland to find that most of my best friends are bi. in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Thursday, October 20 2005 04:13 Profile Homepage #1 quote: gay as Christmas Christmas is a Christian holiday, and being gay is against what the bible says, so, they're not gay at all. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
On Nov 1st, 2005.... in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 17:06 Profile Homepage #35 Darth Vader never said "Luke, I am your father." He said "No. I am your father." -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Runescape anyone? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 15:49 Profile Homepage #25 The problem is Avernum and Geneforge have no multiplayer function, and don't have new features added all the time, so they have less replay value. Now if Jeff were to make a Geneforge: Online or something like that, It'd be totally cool. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Fuainarufantashii Shichi: Otozure no Kodomo-tachi in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 15:43 Profile Homepage #15 Since talk about DBZ has ensued, I just have to link to this. Note: Make sure you have sound on before watching. [ Wednesday, October 19, 2005 15:44: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Runescape anyone? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 06:12 Profile Homepage #13 quote: Anyway.. it would be better if people actually played, instead of hoarding on everything possible. I mean how hard is it to share? I have a rune pick, but I never hoard more stones if there's someone else wanting to pick as well, even if they only have an iron, or even a bronze pick. I don't need more stones. I'll fill my inv sooner or later, and there will be time. Admit it, if people valued common courtesy and politeness there, that game would rock. Since they don't... Well. Gaming goodness which would in other circumstances bring forth mirth and merriment turns into frustration for being bullied by dicks with better picks. Or something else. Fancier equipment. Higher levels, especially. And etc. :\ Yes, the community is terrible. It's a shame when you get called a noob by some 13 year old who is a higher lv but knows less about the game than you. Every time I see a lower lv person stealing ore from another, I go take it all, then give it to the person getting stolen from. There's a bit more courtesy in the member's worlds, but not much (I was a member for a while). It would seem that Runescape is a magnet for pre-pubescent middle-schoolers who have no friends and think they're better than everybody else. BTW, Thralni, if you need a better way to make money, do the Rune Mysteries Quest and mine rune essence. Get like 1k of it, and sell it for 30k. [ Wednesday, October 19, 2005 06:18: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Runescape anyone? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 05:49 Profile Homepage #9 I'm in the lv 50 range, but I don't remember what lv exactly. I think like 56 or 58. Right now i'm trying to earn enough money for full Guthix. I still need everything but the helmet, and I have around 500k, and 100k worth of iron ore. I haven't been playing much lately, however, otherwise I'd already have enough cash for the armor. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Runescape anyone? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 05:16 Profile Homepage #6 quote: System problems due to power failure Due to repeated power outages at one of our hosting facilities some of our systems are still offline. This means some users will be unable to login, and some areas of the website are unavailable. We are working to fix this as soon as possible. From the Runescape website. What world I go to depends on what I plan to do. If I'm mining or trading, I go to the most crowded world, but if I'm fighting, then I go to the least crowded world. I'll go to world 74. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Runescape anyone? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Wednesday, October 19 2005 05:02 Profile Homepage #4 1. Does it cost money? Yes, but they have a free to play (f2p) version as well, but it has about only 1/3 of the world map, and only 1/2 the features. The core elements of the game are still intact, however. 2. Does it suck? That's a matter of opinion. Some people love it some loathe it. Personally, I like it. Those who hate it claim it's hard to get into, it's to slow, and the community is bad. I find it somewhat easy to get into, if you try. Those who claim it's slow never fought Elvarg the Dragon at 4 levels lower than the recommended lvl, wearing crappy armor. How are you having trouble logging in, Thralni? Did you try switching to another world? I never have trouble logging in, so maybe it's your internet connection. BTW, Thralni, my in-game name is Eldibs7. I'll be logged in 6 hours from now. Come find me and i'll hook you up with full steel and a mithril mace (or a steel weapon, if you can't wield mithril yet). [ Wednesday, October 19, 2005 05:03: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
This is getting old. in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 17 2005 17:41 Profile Homepage #20 I fell down to #20 with a new post count of "P )." Also on the list is Toenail1000 at #94 with a new postcount of "The Deranged"", Milla at #118 with a new post count of "Milla"", and Jeros at #140 with a new post count of "Jeros"". I think there might be a few errors in the list. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Motrax-E2 in The Exile Trilogy
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 17 2005 04:53 Profile Homepage #4 In E1, Scrioth shoots flames, in E2, it has defense. I've captured Motrax before. He's always the first monster I go after. And it only took me like 3 minutes (on average) to capture him. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Shall we dance? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 16 2005 18:28 Profile Homepage #17 quote: I'm not of the opinion that any private citizen has any business owning a weapon whose overall intent is to kill or maim a human being. I'm not arguing we should ban handguns - simply that arguments for less stringent regulations are specious and alarmist. I don't think gun control should be decreased. I think it's just fine where it's at. It should be neither increased or decreased. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Shall we dance? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 16 2005 16:16 Profile Homepage #9 quote: Using FBI statistics accumulated on a county level, Lott shows that in states that have strict gun control laws, there are higher crime rates, and in states with liberal gun carry laws, there are much lower crime rates, the more liberal the gun carry laws, the lower the crime rates. Thus, in states where the people have more guns, there is less crime, and this is because criminals in those states know that there is a very good chance that the next crime they attempt to commit, will be met in defense with a firearm to help prevent that crime. From: http://www.universalway.org/guncontrol.html I'm not sure where that person read these statistics at, as I couldn't find them on the FBI site. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Shall we dance? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 16 2005 15:55 Profile Homepage #5 quote: On another hand I can see how tightening the restriction would prevent people who normally would have no business (children, etc.) being anywhere near a gun from haveing a chance at one. And THAT is where the true benefit of gun control is. Keeping people alive is worth a little something no? That's great and all, but bathtubs cause 2x the accidental deaths of children that guns do, and there's no outcry against them. quote: no matter what level of gun control you have just because "you" follow it doesn't mean other less noble people will Exactly. By outlawing guns, you only disarm the law-abiding citizens, not the law-breakers. Statistics show that when gun control is increased in an area, crime goes up. They also show that when gun control goes down, so does crime. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Shall we dance? in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 16 2005 15:12 Profile Homepage #1 How about gun control? In my opinion, some gun control is good, more gun control is bad. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Potions? Tips and Tricks in The Exile Trilogy
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Thursday, October 13 2005 06:22 Profile Homepage #1 They give you skill points. Weak potions give you the least, strong potions give you the most. Brew of knowledge does the same thing, I believe. [ Thursday, October 13, 2005 06:23: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's, Macintosh PC's Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Ghostly Postlies (Mostly) in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Thursday, October 13 2005 04:16 Profile Homepage #6 Yes, it was. quote: In the frozen land of Nador, they were forced to eat Robin's Minstrels... and there was much rejoicing. "Yay. Yay." [ Saturday, October 15, 2005 14:33: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Ethical Survey in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Tuesday, October 11 2005 12:48 Profile Homepage #35 In #4, the person is already in a perilous situation (We were in the nick of time! You were in great peril!(sorry, I had to.)), while in #5, you are putting the person in a perilous situation. #4 isn't exactly passive, but it's more passive than #5. [ Tuesday, October 11, 2005 13:01: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Everyone's a Comedian in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 10 2005 18:32 Profile Homepage #63 Well, since everyone else is doing blonde jokes, I might as well do some. Joke 1 One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde started laughing. This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield. This time the blonde laughed even harder. Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car. The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny. The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!" Joke 2 Two blondes were recently observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. Here is their dialogue: Blonde One: I can't seem to get this door unlocked! Blonde Two: Well, you'd better hurry up and try harder! it's starting to rain, and the top is down! -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Ethical Survey in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 10 2005 18:11 Profile Homepage #6 1. Male. 2. Somewhat. 3. Let me answer that with a quote (of myself): "My favorite vegetable is bacon." 4. Depends. If I have enough time to ask that single person whether or not he'd be willing to sacrifice his life or not, I would go with his decision. If not, I'd throw the switch. I would throw the switch irregardless if the one person was George Bush. 5. Same as before. 6. Ditto. [ Monday, October 10, 2005 18:15: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Everyone's a Comedian in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 10 2005 11:46 Profile Homepage #51 quote: Well, no, that wasn't my intention. I'm more a poke fun at people kind of guy, myself included. Me too. I like to poke fun at people, and don't mind being poked back, as long as it stays at that. On that note: Computers are female The top six reasons computers must be female: 6. As soon as you have one, a better one is just around the corner. 5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic. 4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference. 3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 2. The message "Bad Command or File Name" is about as informative as "If you don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you". AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE: As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it. To be fair, I have to post one about men too: Computers are male Reasons computers must be male 1. They have a lot of data but are still clueless. 2. A better model is always just around the corner. 3. They look nice and shiny until you bring them home. 4. It is always necessary to have a backup. 5. They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons. 6. The best part of having either one is the games you can play. And here is one of the worst jokes I've ever heard: "What did the blind deer salesman say to his customers?" "I have no-eye deer." [ Monday, October 10, 2005 12:19: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
The Abominable Photo Thread 3.6 in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Monday, October 10 2005 09:22 Profile Homepage #14 quote: I think I need a bit of a rest. And a bit of lunch might be good as well, especially considering I skipped breakfast... Missing breakfast causes problems for you? I miss breakfast almost every day (because I refuse to eat breakfast out of a cafeteria), and I never have any trouble. I would post a pic, but I don't have one. Lack of extracurricular activites can have a negative impact on the amount of pictures of yourself available, as can lack of a camera. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Politics and Beliefs in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 9 2005 15:46 Profile Homepage #89 quote: —Alorael, who wouldn't call Occam's Razor a good determination of validity anyway. It tends to be true, but it isn't always true. For an easy example, it's tempting to use Occam's Razor on Einstein and support Newton, but Newton was wrong and Einstein was right. (Experimental evidence supports Einstein anyway, but an Occam hack and slash isn't good science any more than blind belief.) Using something that isn't always right to prove a point is a bad idea. Using Occam's Razor to support Evolution is like using the rule "'i' before 'e' except after 'c'" to try to support a theory that says the word 'their' is spelled 'thier'. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Everyone's a Comedian in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 9 2005 01:59 Profile Homepage #6 I don't get it either. Please explain. -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Everyone's a Comedian in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 9 2005 00:44 Profile Homepage #3 I just remembered one I heard a long time ago: 5 people were in a plane: The pilot, the President, the Pope, the smartest man in the world, and a small boy. The pilot runs into the seating area screaming, "The plane is going to crash!!!!!" The smartest man in the world says, "There are only 4 parachutes, and 5 of us. How do we decide who gets one?" The pilot replies, "Well, since I'm the pilot, I get a parachute." He then grabs a parachute, and jumps from the plane. The President then says, "Well, I'm the President, so I get a parachute." He also grabs one and jumps from the plane. The smartest man in the world says, "Well, since I'm the smartest man in the world, I get one," and he grabs a parachute and jumps. The Pope then says to the boy, "I'm old, I've lived my life for a lot longer than you, so you take the parachute, and I'll go down with the plane." The boy replies by saying, "No, there's enough parachutes for both of us. The smartest man in the world just took my backpack!" -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00
Everyone's a Comedian in General
Eldibs Lifecrafter Member # 1468	written Sunday, October 9 2005 00:11 Profile Homepage #1 Here's one I heard in school one day: This foreigner walks into a bar, and orders 3 beers. The bartender gives him his beers, and the man goes of a drinks the beers 1 sip at a time, and leaves. He comes back the next day and orders the same thing, and the bartender says "You know, the beers start to get flat after I serve them. You can buy them one at a time, and they won't go flat." The man responds saying, "This is a promise me and my 2 brothers made to each other after I left my home country. We would drink three beers at once, in memory of when we drank together." The bartender then serves him the beers. This goes on for a couple weeks, when one day, the man orders 2 beers, instead of 3. The bartender says to the man, "I'm sorry for your loss." The man gets a confused look on his face, then realizes what the bartender meant. Tha man replies, "Oh! No, my brothers are fine. My wife is making me go to AA meetings, so I can't drink anymore, but that hasn't affected my brothers." 2 jokes copied from ebaum's world: Joke 1: A new father goes into the delivery room to see his newborn baby boy. The doctor pulls him aside and says " I have the most amazing news. Your boy can fly". The doctor sees the doubt in the fathers eyes so he offers a demonstration. He picks up the little boy, holds him high in the air and then lets go. The baby falls to the floor with a loud thump. "You son of a ***" says the new father, ready to kill the doctor. " Wait, something must be wrong. He flew this morning. Let me try again". He flings the boy across the room and he slams against the wall and slides down to the floor. "Oh my god, I am going to kill you" says the father as he is running towards the baffeled doctor. "No no wait, I know what I did wrong. I promise it will work this time". He opens the window and tosses the kid out. The kid of course falls 7 stories and leaves a mess on the sidewalk below. By this time the father is choking the doctor. With his last breath the doctor says " I was just messing with you. Your son was born dead." Joke 2: Leaving Minnesota for Colorado, I decide to make a stop at one of those rest areas on the side of the road. I go in the washroom. The first stall was taken so I went in the second stall. I just sat down when I hear a voice from the next stall... "Hi there, how is it going?" Okay, I am not the type to strike conversations with strangers in washrooms on the side of the road. I didn't know what to say so finally I say: "Not bad..." Then the voice says: "So, what are you doing?" I am starting to find that a bit weird, but I say: "Well, I'm going back to Colorado..." Then I hear the person say all flustered: "Look I'll call you back, every time I ask you a question this idiot in the next stall keeps answering me." [ Sunday, October 09, 2005 00:12: Message edited by: Eldibs ] -------------------- "We can learn a lot from crayons. Some are short, some are dull, some are sharp, some are tall. Some have funny names and they are all different colors, but they all learn to live in the same box." "Happy is the man that has wisdom and gets discernment. For having wisdom as gain is better than having silver as gain and having wisdom as produce is better than gold itself" Proverbs 3:14-3:15 The horrible part about life is, you'll never get out of it alive. Currently boycotting: AngelFire, GameFAQ's Everybody should go to this site at least once. Posts: 818 \| Registered: Tuesday, July 9 2002 07:00**

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