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Displayed name	Custer
Member number	3151
Title	Bob's Big Date
Postcount	2367
Homepage	http://desperance.net
Registered	Friday, June 27 2003 07:00

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Suicide in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 9 2004 18:54 Profile Homepage #26 I've considered. I've also realized that everyone's considered, and I'm not the sort of person that does things based on everyone else doing it. Then again, there's also the fact that I like to know pretty much everything beforehand. In other words, if I do off myself, it's probably going to be after the realization sets in that I have cancer, the big purple splotch in the center of my vision wasn't a floodlight, or the Red Army has broken through. -------------------- AnamaFreak (3:59:56 AM): Shounen-ai to the MAX Misogynism is the wave of the future, but it sure pisses the womenfolk off. Shocking, isn't it? Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
This sentence describes a topic containing an entirely self-referential short story. in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Saturday, March 6 2004 23:09 Profile Homepage #0 This Is the Title of This Story, Which Is Also Found Several Times in the Story Itself David Moser This is the first sentence of this story. This is the second sentence. This is the title of this story, which is also found several times in the story itself. This sentence is questioning the intrinsic value of the first two sentences. This sentence is to inform you, in case you haven't already realized it, that this is a self-referential story, that is, a story containing sentences that refer to their own structure and function. This is a sentence that provides an ending to the first paragraph. This is the first sentence of a new paragraph in a self-referential story. This sentence is introducing you to the protagonist of the story, a young boy named Billy. This sentence tells you that Billy is blond and blue-eyed and American and twelve years old and strangling his mother. This sentence comments on the awkward nature of the self-referential narrative form while recognizing the strange and playful detachment it affords the writer. As if illustrating the point made by the last sentence, this sentence reminds us, with no trace of facetiousness, that children are a precious gift from God and that the world is a better place when graced by the unique joys and delights they bring to it. This sentence describes Billy's mother's bulging eyes and protruding tongue and makes reference to the unpleasant choking and gagging noises she's making. This sentence makes the observation that these are uncertain and difficult times, and that relationships, even seemingly deep-rooted and permanent ones, do have a tendency to break down. Introduces, in this paragraph, the device of sentence fragments. A sentence fragment. Another. Good device. Will be used more later. This is actually the last sentence of this story but has been placed here by mistake. This is the title of this story, which is also found several times within the story itself. As Gregor Samsa awoke one morning from uneasy dreams he found himself in his bed transformed into a gigantic insect. This sentence informs you that the preceding sentence is from another story entirely (a better one, it must be noted) and has no place at all in this particular narrative. Despite the claims of the preceding sentence, this sentence feels compelled to inform you that the story you are reading is in actuality ``The Metamorphosis'' by Franz Kafka, and that the sentence referred to by the preceding sentence is the only sentence which does indeed belong to the story. This sentence overrides the preceding sentence by informing the reader (poor, confused wretch) that this piece of literature is actually the Declaration of Independence, but that the author, in a show of extreme negligence (if not malicious sabotage), has so far failed to include even one single sentence from that stirring document, although he has condescended to use a small sentence fragment, namely, ``When in the course of human events,'' embedded in quotation marks near the end of a sentence. Showing a keen awareness of the boredom and downright hostility of the average reader with regard to the pointless conceptual games indulged in by the preceding sentences, this sentence returns us at last to the scenario of the story by asking the question, ``Why is Billy strangling his mother?'' This sentence attempts to shed some light on the question posed by the preceding sentence but fails. This sentence, however, succeeds, in that it suggests a possible incestuous relationship between Billy and his mother and alludes to the concomitant Freudian complications an astute reader will immediately envision. Incest. The unspeakable taboo. The universal prohibition. Incest. And notice the sentence fragments? Good literary device. Will be used more later. This sentence is the first sentence in a new paragraph. This is the last sentence in a new paragraph. This sentence can serve as either the beginning of the paragraph or the end, depending on its placement. This is the title of this story, which is also found several times in the story itself. This sentence raises a serious objection to the entire class of self-referential sentences that merely comment on their own function or placement within the story (e.g., the preceding four sentences), on the grounds that they are monotonously predictable, unforgivably self-indulgent, and merely serve to distract the reader from the real subject of this story, which at this point seems to concern strangulation and incest and who knows what other delightful topics. The purpose of this sentence is to point out that the preceding sentence, while not itself a member of the class of self-referential sentences it objects to, nevertheless also serves merely to distract the reader from the real subject of this story, which actually concerns Gregor Samsa's inexplicable transformation into a gigantic insect (despite the vociferous counterclaims of other well-meaning although misinformed sentences). This sentence can serve as either the beginning of the paragraph or the end, depending on its placement. This is the title of this story, which is also found several times in the story itself. This is almost the title of this story, which is found only once in the story itself. This sentence regretfully states that up to this point the self-referential mode of narrative has had a paralyzing effect on the actual progress of the story itself---that is, these sentences have been so concerned with analyzing themselves and their role in the story that they have failed by and large to perform their function as communicators of events and ideas that one hopes coalesce into a plot, character development, etc.---in short, the very raisons d'être of any respectable, hardworking sentence in the midst of a piece of compelling prose fiction. This sentence in addition points out the obvious analogy between the plight of these agonizingly self-aware sentences and similarly afflicted human beings, and it points out the analogous paralyzing effects wrought by excessive and tortured self-examination. The purpose of this sentence (which can also serve as a paragraph) is to speculate that if the Declaration of Independence had been worded and structured as lackadaisically and incoherently as this story has been so far, there's no telling what kind of warped libertine society we'd be living in now or to what depths of decadence the inhabitants of this country might have sunk, even to the point of deranged and debased writers constructing irritatingly cumbersome and needlessly prolix sentences that sometimes possess the questionable if not downright undesirable quality of referring to themselves and they sometimes even become run-on sentences or exhibit other signs of inexcusably sloppy grammar like unneeded superfluous redundancies that almost certainly would have insidious effects on the lifestyle and morals of our impressionable youth, leading them to commit incest or even murder and maybe that's why Billy is strangling his mother, because of sentences just like this one, which have no discernible goals or perspicuous purpose and just end up anywhere, even in mid Bizarre. A sentence fragment. Another fragment. Twelve years old. This is a sentence that. Fragmented. And strangling his mother. Sorry, sorry. Bizarre. This. More fragments. This is it. Fragments. The title of this story, which. Blond. Sorry, sorry. Fragment after fragment. Harder. This is a sentence that. Fragments. Damn good device. The purpose of this sentence is threefold: (1) to apologize for the unfortunate and inexplicable lapse exhibited by the preceding paragraph; (2) to assure you, the reader, that it will not happen again; and (3) to reiterate the point that these are uncertain and difficult times and that aspects of language, even seemingly stable and deeply rooted ones such as syntax and meaning, do break down. This sentence adds nothing substantial to the sentiments of the preceding sentence but merely provides a concluding sentence to this paragraph, which otherwise might not have one. This sentence, in a sudden and courageous burst of altruism, tries to abandon the self-referential mode but fails. This sentence tries again, but the attempt is doomed from the start. This sentence, in a last ditch attempt to infuse some iota of story line into this paralyzed prose piece, quickly alludes to Billy's frantic cover-up attempts, followed by a lyrical, touching, and beautifully written passage, wherein Billy is reconciled with his father (thus resolving the subliminal Freudian conflicts obvious to any astute reader) and a final exciting police chase scene during which Billy is accidentally shot and killed by a panicky rookie policeman who is coincidentally named Billy. This sentence, although basically in complete sympathy with the laudable efforts of the preceding action-packed sentence, reminds the reader that such allusions to a story that doesn't, in fact, yet exist are no substitute for the real thing and therefore will not get the author (indolent goof-off that he is) off the proverbial hook. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. Paragraph. The purpose. Of this paragraph. Is to apologize. For its gratuitous use. Of. Sentence fragments. Sorry. The purpose of this sentence is to apologize for the pointless and silly adolescent games indulged in by the preceding two paragraphs, and to express regret on the part of us, the more mature sentences, that the entire tone of this story is such that it can't seem to communicate a simple, albeit sordid, scenario. This sentence wishes to apologize for all the needless apologies found in this story (this one included), which, although placed here ostensibly for the benefit of the more vexed readers, merely delay in a maddeningly recursive way the continuation of the by-now nearly forgotten story line. This sentence is bursting at the punctuation marks with news of the dire import of self-reference as applied to sentences, a practice that could prove to be a veritable Pandora's box of potential havoc, for if a sentence can refer or allude to itself, why not a lowly subordinate clause, perhaps this very clause? Or this sentence fragment? Or three words? Two words? One? Perhaps it is appropriate that this sentence gently and with no trace of condescension remind us that these are indeed difficult and uncertain times and that in general people just aren't nice enough to each other, and perhaps we, whether sentient human beings or sentient sentences, should just try harder. I mean, there is such a thing as free will, there has to be, and this sentence is proof of it! Neither this sentence nor you, the reader, is completely helpless in the face of all the pitiless forces at work in the universe. We should stand our ground, face facts, take Mother Nature by the throat and just try harder. By the throat. Harder. Harder, harder. Sorry. This is the title of this story, which is also found several times in the story itself. This is the last sentence of the story. This is the last sentence of the story. This is the last sentence of the story. This is. Sorry. -------------------- AnamaFreak (3:59:56 AM): Shounen-ai to the MAX Misogynism is the wave of the future, but it sure pisses the womenfolk off. Shocking, isn't it? Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Purpose? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Saturday, March 6 2004 12:09 Profile Homepage #68 -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
For all the English kniggets out there... in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Thursday, March 4 2004 15:54 Profile Homepage #40 Stughalf... is American. And Indian. No British, I don't think. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Purpose? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Wednesday, March 3 2004 17:01 Profile Homepage #60 If I understand matters, and chances are I don't, the analogy would be kicking off your marriage by being punched in the cojones. And that sort of thing just isn't what you're in it for, unless you're being married by a sex dwarf, in which case knock yourself out with the virginal honeymoons and nutbusting. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Join the revolution! in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Wednesday, March 3 2004 15:27 Profile Homepage #56 I am interested to know that I am a conservative. And Christ on the Cross, I'm not going to ferment revolution with a man who has a nervous breakdown when people won't pay attention to him. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
RPG Hybrids in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Wednesday, March 3 2004 06:05 Profile Homepage #5 quote: Originally written by ArcticWaffles: Warcraft III has some nice RP elements, combined with of course strategy. IMHO, it's worse for them. I liked SC a lot better, due in great deal to the fact that one idiot with a big sword wasn't particularly able to take out a huge, well-balanced, and expensive army without reinforcement. I would have liked the hero system a lot better if it had made heroes useful backup for armies in the field rather than armies useful backup for heroes in the field. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
your age in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 19:56 Profile Homepage #2 H(0): Hellstreet != Webrat H(a): Hellstreet = Webrat Accepted experimental alpha: 05% z: ~1.64 Nominal constant of sagging: µ = 20, s = 3.25 Coeff. of sagging, subj. 1: 27 Coeff. of sagging, subj. 2: 27 z/sag1 = 3.0 (ơ = 2.3) z/sag2 = 3.0 (ơ = 2.3) z(avg): 3.0 \|z\| = 3.0 3.0 > 1.64 Null hypothesis rejected. [ Tuesday, March 02, 2004 20:03: Message edited by: Custer, Reloaded ] -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler* Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Join the revolution! in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 19:17 Profile Homepage #53 You could say that the whole left side of my body is one big erogenous zone. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Best Free RPG's and MMORPG in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 19:14 Profile Homepage #19 TAKE ME NOW YOU STUD -------------------- AnamaFreak (3:59:56 AM): Shounen-ai to the MAX Misogynism is the wave of the future, but it sure pisses the womenfolk off. Shocking, isn't it? Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Join the revolution! in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 19:10 Profile Homepage #51 What a coincidence. I'm sexually ticklish on my left. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
girlz place in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 18:21 Profile Homepage #116 It's a heart. Think of it on its side. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
girlz place in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Tuesday, March 2 2004 16:39 Profile Homepage #112 quote: Originally written by iDavid: (People, this is a message board, not an AIM chat room. Please treat it as such. If you want to type one-sentence responses to each other, you don't need to do it here.) Sir David, I <3 you with all my <3. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Should we have a chat room? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Monday, March 1 2004 07:31 Profile Homepage #32 There's plenty for me to say. CASE IN POINT UAGFHSHUAHSGHSHGHGSHUGAHGHSGHSHGHAHGHGHAHGAHGAHGAHGHAGHAGHSGHJSGHAGHAHGHGGHH -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Should we have a chat room? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Monday, March 1 2004 07:24 Profile Homepage #29 [ Monday, March 01, 2004 07:25: Message edited by: Butterscotch Custer ] -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Best Free RPG's and MMORPG in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Monday, March 1 2004 07:21 Profile Homepage #6 TAKE ME NOW YOU STUD -------------------- AnamaFreak (3:59:56 AM): Shounen-ai to the MAX Misogynism is the wave of the future, but it sure pisses the womenfolk off. Shocking, isn't it? Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Should we have a chat room? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Monday, March 1 2004 07:18 Profile Homepage #27 quote: Originally written by You know who this is: Did you even look at my last post? I don't want any **faced knob sucking cockmasters making irrelevant posts. I've seen the chat-room, and at any rate I think it's might even be better than some of the other things. But if you don't think so you can go back to them and leave me alone. TRAPPED IN STALL #37, PLEASE SEND HELP/CALL ENCLAVE [ Monday, March 01, 2004 07:19: Message edited by: Butterscotch Custer ] -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00**
Should we have a chat room? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Monday, March 1 2004 07:07 Profile Homepage #25 Listen to me, you translucently retarded pissant: no one is interested in your backwards, nonsensical position on IMing services. If you want to be a neo-luddite, you can do it on your own damn time, and stop harassing the rest of us over it. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Census of Spiderweb community in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 21:11 Profile Homepage #43 White, Quaker, American, 16, 1996, bachelor. 'Eskimo' comes of an Iroquois word meaning 'eaters of raw meat' and is about as tactful as 'redskin'. The First Nation in question, as duly noted already, prefers Inuit. [ Sunday, February 29, 2004 21:12: Message edited by: Butterscotch Custer ] -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Religion, Homosexuality, Etc. in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 21:06 Profile Homepage #29 quote: Originally written by Property of Reality Corp.: That is pretty much why I don't believe in "God-guided evolution." I mean, what kind of God would make the evolution thing just because when He could just create everything and be finished with it? Why would He make organisms suffer for millions of years for natural selection and stuff to occur? Explain the Holocaust, or the Armenian massacre, and every war in human history, if God is just and the Old Testament is accurate. What Bible do you believe in SD? There is no difference; saying any is completely accurate makes as much logical sense as saying the sun is a dodecahedron and made of bismuth. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Purpose? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 21:04 Profile Homepage #29 quote: Originally written by Sir David: Um? Sharp beak? Ow? (Typed before Stughalf's post.) More's the allure. Morgan, ef is a woman. Fluffy, if guns are merely for killing, then why were gun locks invented? A better arguement: If sex is for procreation, why do people derive pleasure from nonprocreative sex? The analogous arguement would be saying that Hungarian toddlers have special glands making them immune to bullets and are more amused by gunfire than anything else. ef, I've never married (obviously), nor been in a relationship long enough to really know what I'm talking about, but it seems to me that sex is often what causes that problem. Sometimes, just sometimes, when I've read every other spot of ink on every page and I've got nothing else to do, I read Dear Abby's column. I can't stand the woman, nor the column, but I have noticed one thing: many of the spouses complaining about their marriage say something like "we were sexually active within x weeks and married x+2 years later". In other words, sex before marriage. Many of them either say or imply that sex is one of the main reasons for their marriage in the first place; if they hadn't had sex, they probably wouldn't have married. Now, I'm sure that goes the other way too; I'm sure that some people marry just because they feel that it justifies sex, and later realize that they married the wrong person; again, because of sex. But it seems to me that sex is often what causes this fantasy attraction thing. One's partener is good in bed, so one starts to think that they are good in other aspects of life; they only realize that they were wrong, that they were seeing illusions, later. If the couple focuses on everything other than sex, they may have a fantasy idea of that rather than the other aspects; but if they're still willing to spend their lives together by that point, I don't think the quality of sex would really matter. EDIT: Yeah, yeah, see above. Not bothering with the response to ef; let her deal with it. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Religion, Homosexuality, Etc. in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 17:35 Profile Homepage #27 'It' is not a disrespectful term unless applied to a human entity. We don't call money 'he' or 'she' either, do we? As for stem-cell research, that arguement is closer to that against cloning -- quite frankly, I think I'd trade curing Parkinson's and giving quadrapalegics the ability to do the Charleston for some crackpot trying and failing to make superhumans any day. All scientific evidence says that humans came from Ethiopia or thereabouts; in other words, just about straddling the equator. The first humans would have been black as night and much hairier, and they would have gotten whiter by natural selection as they spread out. On top of that, you claimed they would have been white and evolved into blacks as time went on. The simple fact is that lightening skin is an advantage, whereas darkening skin is a survival trait. As for God breaking his own rules, it doesn't make any sense, as an omniscient, omnipotent entity, to make rules and then break them. If God is in fact all-knowing and all-powerful, he would have made rules that fit what he was going to end up doing anyway, not made arbitrary ones and ignored them later. (I use personal pronouns out of habit, not some contrived notion of respect.) [ Sunday, February 29, 2004 17:41: Message edited by: Djur ] -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Census of Spiderweb community in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 15:18 Profile Homepage #35 I have my orders and you have yours. -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Should we have a chat room? in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 14:54 Profile Homepage #22 WHEN I HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS AND I FEEL MY FINGER ON YOUR TRIGGER I KNOW NOBODY CAN DO ME NO HARM -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00
Religion, Homosexuality, Etc. in General
Custer Bob's Big Date Member # 3151	written Sunday, February 29 2004 14:44 Profile Homepage #25 TAKE ME NOW YOU STUD -------------------- In a word, gay. --Bob the Impaler Posts: 2367 \| Registered: Friday, June 27 2003 07:00

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