Deathmatch Tournament -- Preliminary Nominations

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AuthorTopic: Deathmatch Tournament -- Preliminary Nominations
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #0
Some of you may be familiar with the concept of the fantasy deathmatch, where two characters (or sometimes, real people) from the same or different worlds are imagined to be fighting to the death, and you have to decide who wins through some combination of realism, kitsch, and wildly subjective judgment. The genre has really come into its own (to the degree that nonbubonic internet memes ever do) thanks to its appearances in Red Mage's column and of course to Celebrity Deathmatch.

I began a deathmatch topic here once which can offer a few good examples:

quote:
6. Captain Planet vs. Rentar-Ihrno: Polluters never win! Captain Planet is immune to attacks by fire, water, earth, or air, and Rentar-Ihrno has a darn predictable attack pattern. Captain Planet also has the power of heart, which probably does something gimpy, and keeps Rentar's demons at bay. Unfortunately, he is easily weakened by toxic material, and he wouldn't do well against acid and poison. No doubt Linka would succeed in shutting down Rentar's machinery during their duel ("Curse you, Planeteers!") but Captain Planet isn't going to come out of this fight in one piece. The monkey cries, and Rentar-Ihrno moves on.

6. Chun-Li vs. Bjork: Bjork has a tank. Chun-Li destroys a tank. Chun-Li has the Spinning Bird Kick. Bjork has a revealing swan dress. I think we all see where this one is going.
In college, my friends in the linguistics department and I would pass the time by doing out deathmatches among our professors. It was pretty funny. The idea occured to me last year to do something similar here and to utilize polls to get the results, but there wasn't enough to go on. However, thanks to Dikiyoba, that has changed. Numerous forum members have been handed a fantastic interpretation with the kinds of powers suitable for deathmatches. Members have trademark spells, weapons, items, and so on. Combined with everyday forum stereotypes, these are wonderful fodder for deathmatches.

So I have decided to commence the 2007 Spiderweb Deathmatch Tournament. For each round (or portion of a round), a poll will be posted containing the pairings for that round. The winner or loser will be determined entirely based on the results of the poll, but the audience is encouraged to post the reasons behind its votes, which will be incorporated into the actual written results. At the end of each round the losers will be eliminated and the winners will move on to the next round and a new set of deathmatches, until only one spidwebber remains.

This topic is for nominating members as tournament participants (and of course for telling me that I'm crazy). 20 members have reserved spots, as determined by me, due to general noteriety, screen time in the scripts, and potential for hillariousness. There are a remaining 28 spots. You can nominate yourself for a spot, or someone else, as many nominations as you like, but each must include a reason that member would make a good deathmatch participant (e.g., "I have been known to resort to poison, and my unrequited love gives me superhuman rage" or "If Icshi is not included, he'll just retroactively win anyway"). Note that appearing in the scripts is NOT a requirement to be considered.

Reserved spots: Drakefyre, *i, Dintiradan, Emperor Tullegolar, Ephesos, Slarty, Alec, Alorael, Salmon, Synergy, Tyranicus, Dikiyoba, Kelandon, TM, Archmage Alex, Arancaytar, Imban, Marlenny, Schrodinger, Thuryl

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Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Councilor
Member # 6600
Profile Homepage #1
I tremble in fear of this new development. :P

Dikiyoba nominates Delicious Vlish. We can't have a deathmatch without a brain-sucking, kilt-wearing, tasty vlish!
Posts: 4346 | Registered: Friday, December 23 2005 08:00
Guardian
Member # 2080
Profile #2
I am somewhat offended to say the least... I nominate Lone Flame.

Edit: Because Lone Flame knows the secret art of Dancing Pseudo Kirby!!! Thus he is unstoppable... with exceptions being walls and closed doors.

[ Tuesday, April 24, 2007 08:19: Message edited by: Gaara of the Funk ]

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"I don't understand a word you just said. Try speaking American. It's the only language I understand."
Posts: 1918 | Registered: Sunday, October 13 2002 07:00
Shaper
Member # 7420
Profile Homepage #3
I don't think it should be done with polls. What's to stop me from registering multiple accounts to assure my victory? It should just be posting your vote, like the other one you made.

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You lose.
Posts: 2156 | Registered: Thursday, August 24 2006 07:00
Lifecrafter
Member # 6700
Profile Homepage #4
I nominate Jewels, due to the fathomless amount of knowledge at her disposal, and because having to be a parent should give enough experience to help her put even the biggest baby in the competition to rest.

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The Silent Assassin has already gone off to write his championship speech.
I'm sure that it will be quite short.

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-Lenar Labs
What's Your Destiny?

Ushmushmeifa: Lenar's power is almighty and ineffable.

All hail lord Noric, god of... well, something important, I'm sure.
Posts: 735 | Registered: Monday, January 16 2006 08:00
Triad Mage
Member # 7
Profile Homepage #5
I nominate game_pu.

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"At times discretion should be thrown aside, and with the foolish we should play the fool." - Menander
====
Drakefyre's Demesne - Happy Happy Joy Joy
Encyclopedia Ermariana - Trapped in the Closet
====
You can take my Mac when you pry my cold, dead fingers off the mouse!
Posts: 9436 | Registered: Wednesday, September 19 2001 07:00
Nuke and Pave
Member # 24
Profile Homepage #6
Is it just one nomination per person? If so, I'll suggest SoT with his sling and sharp one-liners. If we can nominate more than one, I'll add Kel with his Slith Spear and horde of high-level BoA monsters. Also a generic spammer/flamer could give us some fun. (I am saying "generic spammer/flamer" to avoid giving too much attention to any particular one.)

[ Tuesday, April 24, 2007 09:40: Message edited by: Zeviz ]

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Be careful with a word, as you would with a sword,
For it too has the power to kill.
However well placed word, unlike a well placed sword,
Can also have the power to heal.
Posts: 2649 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Shaper
Member # 7472
Profile Homepage #7
Kelandon already has a reserved spot.

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I tried to think of something witty to put here.

Needless to say, I failed.
Posts: 2686 | Registered: Friday, September 8 2006 07:00
Guardian
Member # 6670
Profile Homepage #8
I nominate the Silent Assassin.

EDIT: Reason: It's the Silent Assassin. 'Nuff said.

EDIT: By ET:
quote:
I don't think it should be done with polls. What's to stop me from registering multiple accounts to assure my victory? It should just be posting your vote, like the other one you made.
Seconded. No votes. If there would be a poll, it should be non-binding. It's Slarty's Deathmatch, after all.

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IMAGE(http://www.cupandblade.com/store/catalog/images/0620%20Danger%20Death%20Ray.JPG)

[ Tuesday, April 24, 2007 11:54: Message edited by: Dintiradan ]
Posts: 1509 | Registered: Tuesday, January 10 2006 08:00
Guardian
Member # 5360
Profile #9
Nalyd nominates himself, as he has undead minions, and Dikiyoba, with her uncanny ability to make people beg.

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May the fires of Undeath burn in your soul, and consume it.
Posts: 1636 | Registered: Wednesday, January 5 2005 08:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #10
I denominate anyone that fails at basic reading comprehension.

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Veteran*
Member # 5
Profile #11
What the? I don't get a reserved spot?

This tournament already sucks.
Posts: 455 | Registered: Tuesday, May 17 2005 07:00
By Committee
Member # 4233
Profile #12
I guess you just aren't that popular.
Posts: 2242 | Registered: Saturday, April 10 2004 07:00
Lifecrafter
Member # 7331
Profile Homepage #13
I nominate Nioca, just because.

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You Shall Die Laughing: http://www.worfthecat.ermarian.net/converted

The Roost: www.roost01.proboards104.com. Birds of a feather flock together.
Posts: 794 | Registered: Thursday, July 27 2006 07:00
Veteran*
Member # 5
Profile #14
quote:
Originally written by Drew:

I guess you just aren't that popular.
How do I get to be popular like you?
Posts: 455 | Registered: Tuesday, May 17 2005 07:00
Lifecrafter
Member # 7331
Profile Homepage #15
Post more. Make yourself known.

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You Shall Die Laughing: http://www.worfthecat.ermarian.net/converted

The Roost: www.roost01.proboards104.com. Birds of a feather flock together.
Posts: 794 | Registered: Thursday, July 27 2006 07:00
Guardian
Member # 2080
Profile #16
quote:
Originally written by Mysterious Man:

What the? I don't get a reserved spot?
You'll get over yourself. Or die trying.

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"I don't understand a word you just said. Try speaking American. It's the only language I understand."
Posts: 1918 | Registered: Sunday, October 13 2002 07:00
Law Bringer
Member # 4153
Profile Homepage #17
(EDIT: I'm dumb... Nalyd can nominate himself)

Anyway, the crickets approve of this idea... they haven't seen much action since back when general chats were happening pretty much every other night.

I nominate Nikki, on the condition that he's paired with Aran in the first round. No further explanation should be needed. Also, I nominate Lazarus and Niemand, based on scripting ability.

And I nominate Muffin and Ed, for obvious reasons.

[ Tuesday, April 24, 2007 15:48: Message edited by: Ephesos ]

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Gamble with Gaea, and she eats your dice.

I hate undead. I really, really, really, really hate undead. With a passion.
Posts: 4130 | Registered: Friday, March 26 2004 08:00
Guardian
Member # 2080
Profile #18
quote:
Originally written by Ephesos:

Nalyd, you can't nominate yourself.

Not true.

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"I don't understand a word you just said. Try speaking American. It's the only language I understand."
Posts: 1918 | Registered: Sunday, October 13 2002 07:00
Agent
Member # 8030
Profile Homepage #19
Mysterious Man; probably has a secret weapon.
Thralni; can fly
Excalibur; just to have another newbe ;)
Sarasaphilia; how can you leave him out?

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WWJD?
Posts: 1384 | Registered: Tuesday, February 6 2007 08:00
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #20
Oh my god. Does anybody read anymore?

1. You CAN nominate yourself.
2. You can make AS MANY nominations as you want.
3. Nominations do not count without giving a credible REASON WHY. Drakey, Sarasphilia, and Excalibur, I'm looking at you.
4. Nominating someone who already has a reserved spot is not useful.

Current nominees as of this post: Delicious Vlish, Lone Flame, Jewels, Student of Trinity, the Silent Assassin, Nalyd, Nikki, Lazarus, Niemand, Muffin, Ed, Mysterious Man

Also, who is Lone Flame?

As for the polls, thanks for the feedback -- I may still do the polls but only use them as a supplement. Sort of an "ask the audience" lifeline. People will, of course, be encouraged to post explanations of their votes.

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Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 6489
Profile Homepage #21
I nominate Jeff because it's his forum and Saunders because her motherly love will smother all opponents.

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"You're drinking liquor because you're thirsty? How nasty is your freaking water?" —Lazarus
Spiderweb Chat Room
Avernum RPSummariesOoCRoster
Shadow Vale - My site, home of the Spiderweb Chat Database, BoA Scenario Database, & the A1 Quest List, among other things.
Posts: 1556 | Registered: Sunday, November 20 2005 08:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #22
quote:
Originally written at 5:22 PM by Stopstop the Memec:
Oh my god. Does anybody read anymore?

quote:
Originally written at 1:35 PM by Some Idiot:
I denominate anyone that fails at basic reading comprehension.
My suggestion gains merit, no?

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Off With Their Heads
Member # 4045
Profile Homepage #23
I'd like not to take part, please. Withdraw me.

And Lone Flame is member #2080.

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Arancaytar: Every time you ask people to compare TM and Kel, you endanger the poor, fluffy kittens.
Smoo: Get ready to face the walls!
Ephesos: In conclusion, yarr.

Kelandon's Pink and Pretty Page!!: the authorized location for all things by me
The Archive of all released BoE scenarios ever
Posts: 7968 | Registered: Saturday, February 28 2004 08:00
Agent
Member # 3364
Profile Homepage #24
quote:
Originally written by Lenar:

I nominate Jewels, due to the fathomless amount of knowledge at her disposal...

*scratches head*

Oh, you mean my walkthroughs right? 'Cause otherwise I was gonna say...

ADoS, because he has a big nose and he nose how to use it.

Tyranicus, because he has a lot of experience with death and should have learned how to avoid it by now.(I know he's reserved, but this is a good reason for him to be there.)

Stewboy, because he's always left out of these things and I bet he can growl really loud.

[ Tuesday, April 24, 2007 16:16: Message edited by: Jewels ]

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"Even the worst Terror from Hell can be transformed to a testimony from Heaven!" - Rev. David Wood 6\23\05

"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as you ever can." - John Wesley
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Tuesday, August 19 2003 07:00

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