Deathmatch topics need loving too

Error message

Deprecated function: implode(): Passing glue string after array is deprecated. Swap the parameters in drupal_get_feeds() (line 394 of /var/www/pied-piper.ermarian.net/includes/common.inc).

Pages

AuthorTopic: Deathmatch topics need loving too
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #0
The first round of my deathmatches is as follows. Who do you think will win each match-up, and why?

After a while I'll post the actual results, followed by the next round, and so on.

ROUND ONE
1. Barzahl vs. Garzahd
2. Stimpy vs. Kefka
3. George W. Bush vs. George Jefferson
4. Guy Fawkes vs. Guy Montag
5. The Wizard of Oz vs. the Wizard of Id
6. Captain Planet vs. Rentar-Ihrno
7. Professor X vs. X
8. Madonna vs. Cordelia

--------------------
Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Lifecrafter
Member # 6193
Profile Homepage #1
1. Gharzhad- I don't play geneforge, and Gharzhad is a very bad man.
2. Stimpy - I'm assuming this is Ren and Stimpy, probably the best non-swearing cartoon I've ever seen. Stimpy would slap Kefka to death, and use his wit to wittle away his self-confidence(YOU STUPID IDIOT!!)
3. George W. - He's a redneck, so he can probably shoot a rifle.
4. Guy Fawkes - He loves to blow stuff up, Montag just loves reading and being a pansy(not very useful in a deathmatch, to bad he put aside his flamethrower).
5. The wizard of id- He is occasionally funny, Oz is just a big phony in a movie that I hate.
6. Ihrno- Only Erika could take down this baddie.
7. Professor X - considering the only results we've seen from X's magic is the ability to make a skull annoying, herbs grow, coins appear, and give armor crappy properties, I would say X has a lot to prove.
8. Cordelia - Cordelia Jeff's daughter, or Cordelia the adventurer? Madonna the singer, or the mother of Christ? I'll give the edge to either Cordelia.

--------------------
Guaranteed to blow your mind.

Frostbite: Get It While It's...... Hot?
Posts: 900 | Registered: Monday, August 8 2005 07:00
BANNED
Member # 4
Profile Homepage #2
1. Garzahd.
2. Final Fantasy VI is the only game where the heroes fought to save the world and failed. Kefka.
3. Dick Cheney.
4. One was a conspirator. The other was a conspirator with a giant-ass flamethrower. Guy Montag, but only by a hair. (Technically, Guy Montag won against the system, but only because the system got nuked by a third party.)
5. Id serves a king. Oz is a king. Wizard of Oz.
6. Rentar-Ihrno tried to conquer the world and failed. Captain Planet tried to save the world and succeed, but his adversaries were morons. Rentar-Ihrno, if only because she isn't made useless by killing one of any five civilians.
7. X hurls anvils. Prof. X catches said anvils and throws them back. Professor X.
8. She's a goddamned baby. Madonna.

--------------------
*
Posts: 6936 | Registered: Tuesday, September 18 2001 07:00
Law Bringer
Member # 6489
Profile Homepage #3
1. Garzahd, simply because Exile/Avernum can take Geneforge any day :P
2. Kefka. FFVI forever!
3. George Jefferson. I'm not a huge "Jeffersons", but "All in the Family" was cool.
4. Guy Fawkes. Remember remember the fifth of November. Gunpowder, treason and plot. I see no reason why gunpowder, treason should ever be forgot...
5. Wizard of Id. His magic may not work well, but at least it's real magic.
6. Rentar-Ihrno. Overused plot device she may be, but she still pack some punch.
7. X. Professor X may be awesome, but see how long he lasts if he has to put up with the Xian Skull. :P
8. Cordelia. She has those nice... erm... appendages.
IMAGE(http://www.shadowvale.net/chats/cordelia.JPG)

--------------------
"You're drinking liquor because you're thirsty? How nasty is your freaking water?" —Lazarus
Spiderweb Chat Room
Avernum RPSummariesOoCRoster
Shadow Vale - My site, home of the Spiderweb Chat Database, BoA Scenario Database, & the A1 Quest List, among other things.
Posts: 1556 | Registered: Sunday, November 20 2005 08:00
Shaper
Member # 247
Profile Homepage #4
8. Cordelia! See Angel.

--------------------
The Knight Between Posts.
Posts: 2395 | Registered: Friday, November 2 2001 08:00
Agent
Member # 618
Profile Homepage #5
Garzahd. The other guy was just an invisible newb and Artic-fodder.

Stimpy for being born on the thirteenth day of the thirteenth month.

Dubya. If all else fails, he can nuke it.

Guy Fawkes for having an identity crisis.

The Wizard of Oz, because the ghetto version of that film was so cool.

Rentar, as not many women these days can unleash horrors upon the world and make a good mushroom brew.

X. He's one of the sorts of characters that looks like he'll just sit there and die. In actuality, I'm betting that he has secret ninja powers. >.>

Madonna. For being the bigger and older of the... two people. <.<
Posts: 1487 | Registered: Sunday, February 10 2002 08:00
...b10010b...
Member # 869
Profile Homepage #6
1. I, Garzahd, will knock you all down!

2. One successfully destroyed half a planet. The other apparently resembles a stimp, whatever a stimp is. Going to have to go with Kefka here.

3. One owns a chain of dry-cleaning stores. The other acts like he owns a whole damn country. These really aren't very balanced matchups. Bush.

4. Fictional character with flamethrower vs. real person with explosives? Fawkes.

5. Id. Being as, you know, Oz isn't even a wizard at all.

6. Captain Planet, he's a hero; he's gonna kick the ass of Rentar-Ihrno! Okay, that doesn't actually rhyme very well or fit with the music, but it's the best I can do, so I'm giving the victory to Cpt. Planet anyway.

7. Professor X. Unless they're fighting near stairs.

8. Madonna. I always used custom PCs anyway.

--------------------
The Empire Always Loses: This Time For Sure!
Posts: 9973 | Registered: Saturday, March 30 2002 08:00
Shaper
Member # 5450
Profile Homepage #7
2. Kefka, solely because of IMAGE(http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b117/Spring350/kefka.gif).

--------------------
I'll put a Spring in your step.
:ph34r:
Posts: 2396 | Registered: Saturday, January 29 2005 08:00
Agent
Member # 6581
Profile Homepage #8
1. - Barzhal! POWER!

--------------------
Download Geneforge 4: Rebellion

You have 6 posts. Nobody cares what you think. - Thuryl

Wikipedia may be your friend, but UBB is not. - Dikiyoba
Posts: 1310 | Registered: Tuesday, December 20 2005 08:00
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #9
RESULTS
1. Barzahl vs. Garzahd: Both have an megalomanaical obsession with magical self-augmentation. Barzahl's makes him go insane. Garzahd's doesn't. Advantage, Garzahd.

2. Stimpy vs. Kefka: This one's actually pretty close. Stimpy has the same brand of one-step-removed-from-reality antics as Kefka, although his are (usually) less destructive. So Stimpy is exactly the kind of person who Kefka tolerates, laughs at, and acts all grandiose towards -- giving them the perfect opportunity for a pre-emptive strike (cf. Celes on the Floating Island). The resulting clash between "Happy Happy Joy Joy Happy Happy Joy Joy" and "I hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate..." is likely to obliterate most of the known world. But Stimpy and Kefka are both exceptionally bad at dying, even when they have taken mortal damage over and over again. This would be a stalemate, but Stimpy is likely to get bored and go do something else. Kefka's a tad more obsessive, so he wins by default.

3. George W. Bush vs. George Jefferson: Nucular bombs or no nucular bombs, George W. Bush is not very well coordinated, whereas George Jefferson is downright hyperactive. Jefferson would also confuse Bush by calling him various racial slurs that he has to look up in a dictionary. Too bad the Secret Service will gun him down after the first crack(er). Bush wins.

4. Guy Fawkes vs. Guy Montag: Montag has a flame-retardant suit. Fawkes has 1800 pounds of explosives. Goodbye, Montag.

5. The Wizard of Oz vs. the Wizard of Id: It has been pointed out that Oz was a king whereas Id served a king. It has also been pointed out that Id was a magician whereas Oz only pretended to be one. Unfortunately, both of these statements are not entirely true. Oz abdicated his throne, but he later returned to the land of Oz as a regular citizen, at which time he became an apprentice to the powerful Witch Glinda; they were the only two people in the country who were allowed to practice magic. The Wizard of Id, on the other hand, has a tendency to have his magic backfire on him. Oz is the clear winner.

6. Captain Planet vs. Rentar-Ihrno: Polluters never win! Captain Planet is immune to attacks by fire, water, earth, or air, and Rentar-Ihrno has a damn predictable attack pattern. Captain Planet also has the power of heart, which probably does something gimpy, and keeps Rentar's demons at bay. Unfortunately, he is easily weakened by toxic material, and he wouldn't do well against acid and poison. No doubt Linka would succeed in shutting down Rentar's machinery during their duel ("Curse you, Planeteers!") but Captain Planet isn't going to come out of this fight in one piece. The monkey cries, and Rentar-Ihrno moves on.

7. Professor X vs. X: Professor X, of course, can control X's mind, stop him from attacking, and make him take himself out. Unfortunately for him, that kind of psionic influence doesn't happen instantaneously. Kill spells are faster. Bon voyage, Professor.

8. Madonna vs. Cordelia: It seems I neglected to specify who was involved here. Madonna covers the singer as well as the mother of Christ, while Cordelia covers the child, the titillating adventurer, and the mother of Jasmine. Doing some quick algebraic cancellation, we can get rid of the two mothers of messiahs, as well as the overly visible nipples. For all practical purposes, Cordelia the adventurer ceases to exist without those nipples. So we are left with Madonna the singer minus her nipples against Cordelia the child -- the Sex Bomb against the Poo Bomb. Uh, Sex Bomb wins, hands down. Madonna advances.

ROUND TWO
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka
3. Garzahd vs. X
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes

--------------------
Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 335
Profile Homepage #10
1. Garzahd. He's so powerful that he gets an entirely unexpected cameo two games later!

2. Kefka. Honestly, I think clowns win most deathmatches.

3. Jefferson. If Dubya can't win the War on Terror, what makes the War on Jefferson any more promising? I think we've seen too many poorly conceived and poorly executed wars from the president already.

4. Guy Fawkes. Everyone dreams of blowing up the government once or twice, but Fawkes had the gumption to try it. He got a national holiday out of it, too!

5. Wizard of Id. Alphabetical advantage.

6. Rentar-Ihrno. I don't think Captain Planet can summon enough undead minions or ur-basilisks. This is assuming an E3/A3 Rentar, of course.

7. X has survived demons several times, wandering adventurers, and apparently age itself. Is there anything he can't do (beside hurl anvils)?

8. Cordelia. The Story About the Baby surely explains everything you need to know.

—Alorael, who has another to add: Ed vs. Argh!
Posts: 14579 | Registered: Saturday, December 1 2001 08:00
...b10010b...
Member # 869
Profile Homepage #11
quote:
Originally written by 1 v. One:

ROUND TWO
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna

I'm sure TM could write an interesting confrontation scene between these two, but Rentar's pretty obviously going to win.

quote:
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka
These matchups have somehow managed to be even less balanced than those of last round. Kefka.

quote:
3. Garzahd vs. X
Hell, we don't even need to speculate on this one. The two of them appear together in the same game. Garzahd gives a decent workout to a high-level party intent on his murder, whereas X, well, doesn't. Advantage: Garzahd.

quote:
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes
Historically, Fawkes's plan was foiled by one government; I don't see how he's going to do any better against another. Bush.

--------------------
The Empire Always Loses: This Time For Sure!
Posts: 9973 | Registered: Saturday, March 30 2002 08:00
Councilor
Member # 6600
Profile Homepage #12
quote:
—Alorael, who has another to add: Ed vs. Argh!
Arghhhhhhhhh, due to his sheer resiliency. No matter how many times Ed insults and apologizes, Arghhhhhhhhh will remain the same clueless yet fairly optimistic individual. Besides, Ed is likely to quit halfway through the match.

Dikiyoba.

Edit: Added "optimistic" to the list of Arghhhhhhhhh's advantages.

[ Thursday, April 27, 2006 08:12: Message edited by: Dikiyoba ]
Posts: 4346 | Registered: Friday, December 23 2005 08:00
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #13
I could talk about how arghhhhhhhhh was actually learning and getting better, but I suppose at this point that belongs in the stereotypes thread...

--------------------
Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Shake Before Using
Member # 75
Profile #14
quote:
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna
Madonna has recently taken to the practice of Jewish mysticism. Rentar-Ihrno is actually an archmage. Rentar.

quote:
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka
The Wizard of Oz uses "magic" trickery to rule over a country. Kefka uses the Light of Judgment to rule/destroy the world. Kefka.

quote:
3. Garzahd vs. X
X is an Order Mage. Garzahd is the final boss. Garzahd.

quote:
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes
Isn't this basically how Guy Fawkes lost his life in the first place? Bush.
Posts: 3234 | Registered: Thursday, October 4 2001 07:00
Master
Member # 5977
Profile Homepage #15
quote:
Originally written by 1 v. One:


ROUND ONE
1. Barzahl vs. Garzahd
2. Stimpy vs. Kefka
3. George W. Bush vs. George Jefferson
4. Guy Fawkes vs. Guy Montag
5. The Wizard of Oz vs. the Wizard of Id
6. Captain Planet vs. Rentar-Ihrno
7. Professor X vs. X
8. Madonna vs. Cordelia

1. Garzahd
2. Kefka. I don't know why I chose it probably because it reminded me of a candy bar from israel.
3. George W Bush. He has missiles.
4. Guy..... (to fill in yourself)
5. the Wizard of Id. I don't know him personally, but I heard rumors of the "id-card" campaign he launched, which brought him quite some money.
6. Captain planet. Rentar was beaten already twice.
7. Professor X, as he has a title (professor).
8. madonna, with her ear-deafening singing.

EDIT: why am I always too late?

[ Thursday, April 27, 2006 08:28: Message edited by: Mc 'mini' Thralni ]

--------------------
Play and rate my scenarios:

Where the rivers meet
View my upcoming scenario: The Nephil Search: Escape.

Give us your drek!
Posts: 3029 | Registered: Saturday, June 18 2005 07:00
Shock Trooper
Member # 5969
Profile #16
1) Rentar-Ihrno beats Madonna. Anyone can make better music than Madonna, which probably includes Vahnatai; therefore, Madonna loses at life. XD

2) The Wizard of Oz wins because I have no idea who Kefka is. (If it were Kafka, he would win because his consciousness is streamier. *nods wisely*)

3) X. Just because he made the Xian (every time I see that I still try to pronounce it like a Chinese word) Skull. "I used to cry because I had no hat. Until I met a man who had no head."

4) Guy Fawkes. How many people do you know who have a holiday named after them?

--------------------
A C, an E-flat, and a G walk into the Tower of the Magi.
Ambrin walks up to them and says, "Hey! It's the Triad!"
Kelner snorts and says, "Pretty minor Triad if you ask me."
Posts: 242 | Registered: Thursday, June 16 2005 07:00
Nuke and Pave
Member # 24
Profile Homepage #17
quote:
Originally written by 1 v. One:

...
ROUND TWO
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka
3. Garzahd vs. X
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes

I am guessing next round's matchup is going to be:
Rentar-Ihrno v. Garzahd and Kefka v. Bush
with the final round being Rentar-Ihrno v. Kefka

Unless Slarty wants to amuze us with the final: Madonna v. Bush, Madonna wins. :)

[ Thursday, April 27, 2006 13:05: Message edited by: Zeviz ]

--------------------
Be careful with a word, as you would with a sword,
For it too has the power to kill.
However well placed word, unlike a well placed sword,
Can also have the power to heal.
Posts: 2649 | Registered: Wednesday, October 3 2001 07:00
Lifecrafter
Member # 6193
Profile Homepage #18
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna - Rentar wins. Madonna doesn't even have the power of sluttiness now.
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka - Kefka. I was rooting for Stimpy to pull the upset, but now Kefka has a clear path to the finals.
3. Garzahd vs. X - Garzahd wins.
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes - Bush wins. Fawkes will try to blow up Bush, but his attempts will be foiled by the secret service. Then Bush will win a fist fight.

--------------------
Guaranteed to blow your mind.

Frostbite: Get It While It's...... Hot?
Posts: 900 | Registered: Monday, August 8 2005 07:00
E Equals MC What!!!!
Member # 5491
Profile Homepage #19
quote:
Originally written by 1 v. One:


1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna
2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka
3. Garzahd vs. X
4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes

1. Madonna looks better for her age than Rentar, so I'm betting that she'll win in a wait-to-the-death.

2. No opinion.

3. By E3, Garzhad is dead and X is alive. This result is pre-decided.

4. Bush gave us Farenheit 9/11. Guy Fawkes gave us V for Vendetta. Fawkes wins.

[ Thursday, April 27, 2006 13:58: Message edited by: Ash Lael ]

--------------------
SupaNik: Aran, you're not big enough to threaten Ash. Dammit, even JV had to think twice.
Posts: 1861 | Registered: Friday, February 11 2005 08:00
BANNED
Member # 4
Profile Homepage #20
1. One is a washed-up singer, the other is a washed-up yet still hyper-powerful archmage villain. Rentar.

2. I HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE YOU! (Kefka.)

3. Garzahd.

4. Dick Cheney.

--------------------
*
Posts: 6936 | Registered: Tuesday, September 18 2001 07:00
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #21
RESULTS
1. Rentar-Ihrno vs. Titless Madonna: The question here is whether or not Madonna's singing can cause Rentar-Ihrno's crystals to shatter. I don't think so. On the up side, though, after Madonna is killed, she stands a good chance of being revived as a lich.

2. The Wizard of Oz vs. Kefka: This matchup is, admittedly, rather unfair. Goodbye, Oscar Zoroaster Phadrig Isaac Norman Henkel Emmannuel Ambroise Diggs.

3. Garzahd vs. X: Okay, another unfair fight. Professor X vs. Garzahd would have been much more interesting. Garzahd wins, clearly. The next round will be better.

4. George W. Bush vs. Guy Fawkes: The White House crafts scenarios very similar to the plan Fawkes participated in when they need to distract the media from actual issues. Remember that paper bag on the White House lawn? Not only would Fawkes be slaughtered, he would become political capital for George W.

DEATHMATCH ONE, ROUND THREE
1. Kefka vs. George W. Bush
2. Garzahd vs. Rentar-Ihrno

To keep things interesting, I think I'll stagger the appearance of new brackets. Some of you will find this new one more personally endearing.

DEATHMATCH TWO, ROUND ONE
1. Thuryl vs. Mr. Potato Head
2. Marlenny vs. Ms. Pac-Man
3. Kelandon vs. Malcolm (in the Middle)
4. Alec vs. Rainbow Brite
5. Noam Chomsky vs. Rush Limbaugh
6. Chun Li vs. Bjork
7. Shadow vs. Ayla
8. Mojo Jojo vs. Hargon (the Sorceror)

--------------------
Slarty vs. DeskDesk vs. SlartyTimeline of ErmarianG4 Strategy Central
Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
...b10010b...
Member # 869
Profile Homepage #22
quote:
DEATHMATCH ONE, ROUND THREE
1. Kefka vs. George W. Bush
Kefka already killed an emperor. A president should be easy.

quote:
2. Garzahd vs. Rentar-Ihrno
As with X vs Garzahd, we have fairly good ingame evidence for this one. Your party can kill Garzahd but is no match for Rentar. Plus, Rentar manages to control Garzahd (albeit in undead form) in A4. Rentar wins.

quote:
DEATHMATCH TWO, ROUND ONE
1. Thuryl vs. Mr. Potato Head
I recuse myself from giving an opinion on this one, on account of a conflict of interest.

quote:
2. Marlenny vs. Ms. Pac-Man
What the? Um, um, Marlenny, on the grounds that she is neither a ghost nor a piece of fruit.

quote:
3. Kelandon vs. Malcolm (in the Middle)
Kelandon looks like he could handle himself in a fight. Malcolm, well, doesn't.

quote:
4. Alec vs. Rainbow Brite
These are just getting strange. Alec.

quote:
5. Noam Chomsky vs. Rush Limbaugh
Limbaugh, on the grounds that he's about 20 years younger and considerably more spry.

quote:
6. Chun Li vs. Bjork
Did you ever see the music video for Army of Me? Bjork has a Goddamned tank.

quote:
7. Shadow vs. Ayla
Shadow, on the grounds that he doesn't need to be at level 90-something to do ludicrous amounts of damage.

quote:
8. Mojo Jojo vs. Hargon (the Sorceror)
Wouldn't it have been funny if the Japanese prime minister during World War II had been a monkey? Then we'd have called him Mojo Tojo! And having made an awful pun about his name I'm now pretty much obliged to give the victory to MJ.

[ Thursday, April 27, 2006 17:01: Message edited by: Thuryl ]

--------------------
The Empire Always Loses: This Time For Sure!
Posts: 9973 | Registered: Saturday, March 30 2002 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 335
Profile Homepage #23
1.3.1: Kefka. While both Kefka and Dubya have been accused of destabilizing the world, Dubya just causes, you know, instability. Kefka managed a pretty good Book of Revelations piece of work.

1.3.2: Rentar-Ihrno. She's the final enemy twice and immortal twice. Garzahd is a final enemy once and a helpless final dungeon minion once.

2.1.1: Thuryl. He has a masterful knowledge of many subjects, but has not yet passed the Turing Test. Mr. Potato Head is a toy with interchangeable parts that has not passed the Turing Test. The match looks very even until you factor in Thuryl's apparent ability to inspire fervid lust in all who behold him. At that point it's obvious, isn't it?

2.1.2: I resist the urge to pun badly and say Marlenny. She's got one more degree of freedom, a more varied diet, and hapless men in the palm of her hand.

2.1.3: Kel. I don't think Malcolm could make TM nearly as angry. Malcolm also doesn't speak Latin or Greek, never translates parts of the Bible, and won't debate conlanguistics. (Neologism, ha!)

2.1.4: Alec. Cuteness and sparkles are no match for two-fisted fury.

2.15: Noam Chomsky. Give Limbaugh a bottle of OxyContin and the rest is a cakewalk.

2.1.6: I had to Wikipedia both to make a decision, but I'll go with Chun Li. A singer, even a singer with tanks, cannot stand up to martial arts. Everyone knows martial arts can deflects shells and crush armies.

2.1.7: Shadow. Shadow is accompanied by a dog and Ayla is accompanied by (apparently) a dinosaur, but the former is somehow much more dangerous than the latter. Shadow throws pointed things while Ayla throws rocks. Shadow represents civilized deadliness while Ayla represents ignorant barbarians. It's obvious, really.

2.1.8: Hargon. A villain in a true RPG classic would never be defeated by a former lackey. Well, not unless the lackey was an evil minion who overthrew the former evil overlord to become the eviler overlord. (See Kefka.)

—Alorael, who can't wait for 4.1, 2.2, and 3.1 concurrently.
Posts: 14579 | Registered: Saturday, December 1 2001 08:00
BANNED
Member # 4
Profile Homepage #24
1. Kefka. George Bush can launch nukes at you, but he can't singlehandedly slam a beam of sheer energy fueled by the gods anywhere he wishes. (Yet.)

2. I'm going to say Garzahd. Not only was Garzahd beaten with every other powerful archmage on the planet allied against him, but Rentar was beaten by a lone group of adventurers. That's it. (Of course, it's possible to get Erika to help the party, but it is still possible to beat the game without Erika's help. The same cannot be said of Garzahd.) Nevermind that the armies Garzahd placed between the party and himself were actually massively smaller than those Rentar used to fight off the party in E3.

As for Deathmatch 2:

1. One is a live human being with access to fire. The other is inanimate and poses no hazard save for that of choking on its pieces. Lucien Raphael Tihon Damian "Thuryl" McMahon.

2. Marlenny.

3. I'm giving it to Kel for the age/size advantage, although honestly, Malcom could probably run away fairly well.

4. I broke my Rainbow Brite when I was 5. It was on accident, even.

5. Thuryl is obviously smoking something potent. Despite being older, all Chomsky has to do is sit in a corner while Limbaugh has a goddamned heartattack or OD's on osycontin.

6. Technically, it wasn't a tank, just a large truck. But even so, if Björk had a tank, how the hell could she adapt to Chun Li's speed? Chun Li.

7. Shadow by far. The only drawback is not being able to Ragnarok/Illumina/Genji Glove/Offering it up, but considering that you can do that with only one character, his whole "throw 99 Falchions for ~9k damage apiece" bit becomes appealing, nevermind his being able to reliably do Fire/Lightning/Water damage and his invisibility skeans.
Ayla hits things. Shadow for the ultimate win.

8. One is a wizard who successfully destroyed a country but was beaten by a group of adventurers. Another is a hyper-intelligent simian who successfully destroys Townsville multiple times on a daily basis, only to get defeated by three superheroes who have literally beaten Satan multiple times. Mojo Jojo for the win.

--------------------
*
Posts: 6936 | Registered: Tuesday, September 18 2001 07:00

Pages