Harry Potter

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AuthorTopic: Harry Potter
Law Bringer
Member # 6785
Profile #25
quote:
Originally written by Jumpin' Sarcasmon:

So, JK finally figured out how rich she needed to be?
From welfare mother to making more than the Queen, capitalism is great.
Posts: 4643 | Registered: Friday, February 10 2006 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 2984
Profile Homepage #26
"Fiendfyre", indeed. Magical flames that spread really fast, cannot be extinguished, and destroy everything.

Rip-off. :P

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EncyclopaediaArchivesMembersRSS [Topic / Forum] • BlogPolarisNaNoWriMo
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. | I have a love of woodwind instruments.
"That damn meddling eskimo." --WKS about Alorael
Posts: 8752 | Registered: Wednesday, May 14 2003 07:00
Agent
Member # 5814
Profile #27
quote:
Originally written by jg.faust:

Rip-off. :P
Show-off. :P

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It's only an eye, my lord.
Posts: 1115 | Registered: Sunday, May 15 2005 07:00
Veteran*
Member # 5
Profile #28
http://www.bash.org/?111338

<JonJonB> Purely in the interests of science, I have replaced the word "wand" with "wang" in the first Harry Potter Book
<JonJonB> Let's see the results...

<JonJonB> "Why aren't you supposed to do magic?" asked Harry.
<JonJonB> "Oh, well -- I was at Hogwarts meself but I -- er -- got expelled, ter tell yeh the truth. In me third year. They snapped me wang in half an' everything

<JonJonB> A magic wang... this was what Harry had been really looking forward to.

<JonJonB> "Yes, yes. I thought I'd be seeing you soon. Harry Potter." It wasn't a question. "You have your mother's eyes. It seems only yesterday she was in here herself, buying her first wang. Ten and a quarter inches long, swishy, made of willow. Nice wang for charm work."
<JonJonB> "Your father, on the other hand, favored a mahogany wang. Eleven inches. "

<JonJonB> Harry took the wang. He felt a sudden warmth in his fingers. He raised the wang above his head, brought it swishing down through the dusty air and a stream of red and gold sparks shot from the end like a firework, throwing dancing spots of light on to the walls

<JonJonB> "Oh, move over," Hermione snarled. She grabbed Harry's wang, tapped the lock, and whispered, 'Alohomora!"

<JonJonB> The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.

<JonJonB> He bent down and pulled his wang out of the troll's nose. It was covered in what looked like lumpy gray glue.

<JonJonB> He ran onto the field as you fell, waved his wang, and you sort of slowed down before you hit the ground. Then he whirled his wang at the dementors. Shot silver stuff at them.

<JonJonB> Ok
<JonJonB> I have found, definitive proof
<JonJonB> that J.K Rowling is a dirty DIRTY woman, making a fool of us all
<JonJonB> "Yes," Harry said, gripping his wang very tightly, and moving into the middle of the deserted classroom. He tried to keep his mind on flying, but something else kept intruding.... Any second now, he might hear his mother again... but he shouldn't think that, or he would hear her again, and he didn't want to... or did he?
<melusine > O_______O
<JonJonB> Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang

<JonJonJonB> Then, with a sigh, he raised his wang and prodded the silvery substance with its tip.

<JonJonJonB> 'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.
Posts: 455 | Registered: Tuesday, May 17 2005 07:00
Guardian
Member # 5360
Profile #29
Yay! Wizard porn!

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May the fires of Undeath burn in your soul, and consume it.
Posts: 1636 | Registered: Wednesday, January 5 2005 08:00
...b10010b...
Member # 869
Profile Homepage #30
And, of course, the ultimate:

"Wangs are only as powerful as the wizards who use them. Some wizards just like to boast that theirs are bigger and better than other people's."

Hell, even if you read it as "wands" it's obvious that Rowling knew exactly what she was writing.

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The Empire Always Loses: This Time For Sure!
Posts: 9973 | Registered: Saturday, March 30 2002 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 6489
Profile Homepage #31
I have in my hands my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. :D

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"You're drinking liquor because you're thirsty? How nasty is your freaking water?" —Lazarus
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Posts: 1556 | Registered: Sunday, November 20 2005 08:00
Agent
Member # 1934
Profile Homepage #32
You lucky East-coast people...

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You acquire an item: Radio Free Foil
Posts: 1169 | Registered: Monday, September 23 2002 07:00
Guardian
Member # 6670
Profile Homepage #33
By Tyran:
quote:
I have in my hands my wang.
FYT.

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Note: Significant plot details follow.
Ron Weasley is revealed to be...
IMAGE(http://www.movie-gazette.com/directory/img/ron+howard.jpg)
Not wishing to die, he signs up for directing the seventh movie.
Significant plot details end here.
Posts: 1509 | Registered: Tuesday, January 10 2006 08:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #34
quote:
Originally written by Tyranicus:

I have in my hands my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. :D
1. Who won?
2. Who done it?
3. Not too tough to type with a damn book in your hands?

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WWtNSD?

Synergy - "I don't get it."
Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Law Bringer
Member # 6785
Profile #35
quote:
Originally written by Tyranicus:

I have in my hands my copy of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. :D
You know that they made a mistake at the book binders and insert the ending from another book?
Posts: 4643 | Registered: Friday, February 10 2006 08:00
Law Bringer
Member # 2984
Profile Homepage #36
quote:
Originally written by Dintiradan:

By Tyran:
quote:
I have in my hands my wang.
FYT.

Speaking of which, there are once again a whole load of places in the book that become hilarious on s/wand/wang.

"I am the true master of the Elder Wand." -Harry.

[ Friday, July 20, 2007 22:51: Message edited by: jg.faust ]

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EncyclopaediaArchivesMembersRSS [Topic / Forum] • BlogPolarisNaNoWriMo
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. | I have a love of woodwind instruments.
"That damn meddling eskimo." --WKS about Alorael
Posts: 8752 | Registered: Wednesday, May 14 2003 07:00
Infiltrator
Member # 65
Profile Homepage #37
Finished reading about an hour ago. Lot's of stuff happened.

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Milla-Displacer Beastie

This is also a good site
Posts: 650 | Registered: Thursday, October 4 2001 07:00
Law Bringer
Member # 2984
Profile Homepage #38
From the BBC article:

quote:
"I've been talking to my friends about Harry Potter theories for so long, and I'm not going to be able to do that anymore. What will I do with my life?"
- "What Life?" :P

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EncyclopaediaArchivesMembersRSS [Topic / Forum] • BlogPolarisNaNoWriMo
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. | I have a love of woodwind instruments.
"That damn meddling eskimo." --WKS about Alorael
Posts: 8752 | Registered: Wednesday, May 14 2003 07:00
Infiltrator
Member # 65
Profile Homepage #39
I thought the "Draco is a werewolf" theory was pretty good. Of course that never happened.

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Milla-Displacer Beastie

This is also a good site
Posts: 650 | Registered: Thursday, October 4 2001 07:00
Shaper
Member # 6292
Profile #40
Apparently Milla can read a Harry Potter novel in 22 minutes. Impressive.

I will be picking up my copy later today at the flagship Costco here in Kirkland, WA, and reading it soonest, before some twit somewhere about me casually betrays things I'd rather not hear, like who dies. Even though of course it will be Harry. :P

-S-

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A4 ItemsA4 SingletonG4 ItemsG4 ForgingG4 Infiltrator NR Items The Lonely Celt
Posts: 2009 | Registered: Monday, September 12 2005 07:00
Law Bringer
Member # 2984
Profile Homepage #41
quote:
Originally written by Synergy:

I'd rather not hear, like who dies. Even though of course it will be Harry. :P

-S-

Yeah, but then he gets all Gandalf and goes "Lo, I'm Harry the White!"

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EncyclopaediaArchivesMembersRSS [Topic / Forum] • BlogPolarisNaNoWriMo
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. | I have a love of woodwind instruments.
"That damn meddling eskimo." --WKS about Alorael
Posts: 8752 | Registered: Wednesday, May 14 2003 07:00
Shaper
Member # 3442
Profile Homepage #42
I finished it.

It turns out, as I explained in the "What are you reading thread", that it was all a bad LSD trip by a London tramp. Kinda like a working class Dallas, so Thuryl will get his wish in a way.

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You are sleeping, you do not want to believe...

Posts: 2864 | Registered: Monday, September 8 2003 07:00
Agent
Member # 2820
Profile #43
I never appreciated Rowling's writing very much. I thought the Harry Potter books were slightly better than mediocre, and I think it is very commendable and admirable for a person like her to follow through with her dreams and succeed. However, in my opinion, there are hundreds of better fantasy writers out there whose characters are better developed and whose writing style is more literarily cultivated and advanced.

I think the movies are pretty enjoyable to watch for PG-13, though.

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Thuryl: I mean, most of us don't go around consuming our own bodily fluids, no matter how delicious they are.
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Alorael: War and violence would end if we all had each other's babies!
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Drakefyre: Those are hideous mangos.
Posts: 1415 | Registered: Thursday, March 27 2003 08:00
Shock Trooper
Member # 4239
Profile #44
quote:
Originally written by Garrison:

I never appreciated Rowling's writing very much. I thought the Harry Potter books were slightly better than mediocre, and I think it is very commendable and admirable for a person like her to follow through with her dreams and succeed. However, in my opinion, there are hundreds of better fantasy writers out there whose characters are better developed and whose writing style is more literarily cultivated and advanced.
Something's wrong with you. Her writing is easy to read, clever, and fun. It's not high fantasy like Lord of the Rings, perhaps, but then again no attempt at high fantasy I've read besides Lord of the Rings really pulls it off too well.

I finished the book at ~7AM EST, but I'll give you my two predictions from beforehand. I was pretty sure that during Harry and Voldemort's final duel Snape was going to sacrifice himself as a distraction of some kind, allowing Harry to kill Voldemort.
I was somewhat less sure that we would find out two new reasons why Snape hated James Potter (and apparently Harry) and Harry calling him coward so much:
1) That Snape had had a crush on (or been in love with) Lily at school, and
2) Snape had had to swear an Unbreakable Oath to work for the Order, with James Potter either being sworn to or being the bonder.

I leave it as an exercise to the reader to find out how correct or incorrect I was. ;)

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There are two kinds of game players...those who are newbies, and those who were.
Posts: 322 | Registered: Monday, April 12 2004 07:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #45
When did reading become a contest of speed?

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WWtNSD?

Synergy - "I don't get it."
Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Agent
Member # 2759
Profile Homepage #46
About when Goblet of Fire was published, I think.

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"Blink and you're dead... Don't turn your back, don't look away and don't blink."

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Posts: 1104 | Registered: Monday, March 10 2003 08:00
By Committee
Member # 4233
Profile #47
I finished it at about noon today, and then have been asleep for the last six hours. :) That said, while I think it may not have been the most creative - it was very "Return of the Jedi" in feel - it was certainly very enjoyable, and I think she acquitted herself pretty well. Don't know how the heck they're going to crame most of that into a movie.
Posts: 2242 | Registered: Saturday, April 10 2004 07:00
Raven v. Writing Desk
Member # 261
Profile Homepage #48
I agree with Garrison, and I think Drew's Star Wars comparison is an incisive one. The Potter books are good books, very good books even; but they are not timeless works of artifice that are crenelated and crammed with meaning and metaphor. They access some timeless story patterns, but there is no enlightening counterpoint played over the lines. That isn't necessarily a criticism, but Tolkien and Lewis and Carroll (and Nesbit and Orwell and Milne and St-Exupery and, yes, Dr. Seuss) will all be read further into the future than Rowling will be.

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Posts: 3560 | Registered: Wednesday, November 7 2001 08:00
Shock Trooper
Member # 5545
Profile Homepage #49
I agree with Thuryl. This thread profoundly effected the way I read this book. Try applying the double meaning in "He drew out his own wand and compared lengths."

[ Saturday, July 21, 2007 14:20: Message edited by: Actaeon ]

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Plaudite, amici, comedia finita est.
Posts: 344 | Registered: Friday, February 25 2005 08:00

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