There really is a conspiracy

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AuthorTopic: There really is a conspiracy
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #0
From wikipedia, the source of all that is wholesome and righteous on the internet.
quote:

Over any given 400-year cycle the 13th day of the month occurs 4800 times. The distribution of 13th day of the month is as follows:
Monday ( 685 or 14.27% ),Tuesday ( 685 or 14.27% ),Wednesday ( 687 or 14.31% ),Thursday ( 684 or 14.25% ),Friday ( 688 or 14.34% ),Saturday ( 684 or 14.25% ),Sunday ( 687 or 14.31% ).This means the 13th day of the month is slightly more likely to occur on a Friday
My question would be, is it unethical of me to use my bosses fear of this day against her? Or is it just wrong? Actually I have no problem with either of those things, so any suggestions on how to freak her out would be appreciated. Of course the ideal situation would be a complete mental breakdown, followed by years of shock therapy, but I suspect that would be considered overplaying one's hand.
*this message sponsored by Aran's freaky php 'n' mysqueal powers*

[ Thursday, January 12, 2006 22:30: Message edited by: Jumpin' Salmon ]

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
...b10010b...
Member # 869
Profile Homepage #1
If you're that motivated to cause your boss suffering, it sounds like what you really need is a better boss.

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The Empire Always Loses: This Time For Sure!
Posts: 9973 | Registered: Saturday, March 30 2002 08:00
BANNED
Member # 4
Profile Homepage #2
But if you're still in the market for ideas, try spiking your boss' coffee with LSD.

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Posts: 6936 | Registered: Tuesday, September 18 2001 07:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #3
Fresh out, but good idea. It would probably have to be a preamble to some fake supernatural happenings though. I imagine that LSD would not be that strange of a trip. At least not an unfamiliar one.

*this message sponsored by the pranksters*

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Warrior
Member # 1320
Profile #4
Theres always the good old "Fill-the-coffee-machine-up-with-espresso-and-after-two-months-change-it-to-decaf"-trick! Aha-ha...

I suspect you've heard that one before.

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-Step aside, worthy adversary!
-T'is but a scratch!
-A scratch! Your arms off!
(pause)
-I've had worse!
-You liar!
-C'mon, you pansy!
(Fighting continues.)
-Allright. We'll call it a draw then.
-Oh I see. Running away are we? You yellow bastard! Come back here and take whats coming for you! I'll bite your legs off!

"You know that you've played Halo 2 to much when you sit down for dinner, pick your fork up, look at the knife, and in the corner of your vision, you see *Press X to pick up Press Y to dual wield*"
Posts: 182 | Registered: Monday, June 17 2002 07:00
Agent
Member # 3364
Profile Homepage #5
Disconnect the keyboard from her computer.

Put blue food coloring into the water cooler.

Grease the toilet seats in all the restrooms with personal lubricant, preferrably the kind that warms to the touch.

Take the round circles from all the hole punchers and put them in the air vents of her car. Tip the air vents up and turn it on high. If her car is locked coat hoods, hats, and umbrellas work just as well.

Sign her up for a subscription to Playgirl, (or Playboy which ever suits your fancy) have it delivered to the office.

If she has a fabric covered office chair, pour water evenly over the whole thing so the color matches. If the chair has coasters, put black electrical tape or duct tape on the bottom of the wheels making them stick.

[ Friday, January 13, 2006 07:11: Message edited by: Jewels ]

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"Even the worst Terror from Hell can be transformed to a testimony from Heaven!" - Rev. David Wood 6\23\05

"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as you ever can." - John Wesley
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Tuesday, August 19 2003 07:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #6
And all along I thought you were a good person Jewels.

My master plan has involved the slow degredation of the florescent light fixtures. She's now down to one bulb, which flickers intermittently.

I would have tried the computer thing, but I would have had to "fix" it. I think I'll just end up counting on her lack of enthusiasm and figure she'll give up on work at some point in the morning.

And yes Thuryl, once this project is done I'll begin the search for a better job.

*this message sponsored by westinghouse*

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Agent
Member # 3364
Profile Homepage #7
Hey, I still know how to laugh. Nothing wrong with a little fun. I have restrained myself from suggesting anything really nasty like wiping out her hard drive. If you want something still annoying but a little more subtle you could try this.

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"Even the worst Terror from Hell can be transformed to a testimony from Heaven!" - Rev. David Wood 6\23\05

"Do all the good you can, by all the means you can, in all the ways you can, in all the places you can, at all the times you can, to all the people you can, as long as you ever can." - John Wesley
Posts: 1001 | Registered: Tuesday, August 19 2003 07:00
Shaper
Member # 5450
Profile Homepage #8
quote:
Originally written by Jewels:

Put blue food coloring into the water cooler.

Better yet, put yellow food coloring in the water cooler.

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I'll put a Spring in your step.
:ph34r:
Posts: 2396 | Registered: Saturday, January 29 2005 08:00
? Man, ? Amazing
Member # 5755
Profile #9
It turned out that her personal karma is so low that no action or inaction I took would have made her day any worse.

1. An employee decided to file a worker's compensation claim of dubious validity.
2. She messed up her time card and got paid less than she expected.
3. An intern decided, with his advisor's help, that he shouldn't be helping us.

By the end, I was almost feeling sorry for her, so I left.

*this message sponsored by salvador molly's*

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quote:
Originally written by Kelandon:

Well, I'm at least pretty sure that Salmon is losing.


Posts: 4114 | Registered: Monday, April 25 2005 07:00
Warrior
Member # 5274
Profile #10
Pity is for the weak.

More karma lowering I say.

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I assume my reputation for arrogant presumption precedes me
Posts: 107 | Registered: Thursday, December 9 2004 08:00